My buddy’s Escalade got broken into yesterday.  The assailant drilled a tiny hole into his driver door, which must have popped the lock.

Another buddy’s Acura has almost been stolen 3 times now… I say almost because he’s managed to catch the thieves in the act each time.  (He’s got multiple backup batteries/alarms.)  Regardless, the thieves have caused major damage, one time ripping out every electric cord they saw in order to disable the entire car.

Additionally, I had another friend who’s 350z was found 8 miles from his house on a tow truck – the thieves drove up, attached the hooks, lifted and dragged it off.

Plus, I just watched ‘Gone in Sixty Seconds,’ so you get a Car Theft Hysteria post.

The Bad News / Downers

If I see you trying to steal my car,  Nevada state law says I can’t shoot you unless I feelmy life is in danger.  So unless I can arguably prove you saying ‘ I have a gun,’ I can’t deter you with lead.

Most car thieves in Vegas are well prepared…  E.g. Tow trucks, drills etc.

Most car thieves in Vegas have no fear.

And apparently nobody watches for anything suspicious in parking lots, aka Power Tools, random tow trucks and Mischief.

The Good News – Sort of

It seems if somebody really wants your car, or something in it – unfortunately they’re gonna get it.   My idea, is give them more than they bargained for.

I’m not really a thief, but I think I have a good idea of what people ‘would’ steal.

Here are my options.

Plan 1 -

1. One empty bottle of Patron / Goose / Alize / whatever
2. Acquire Ipecac – Ipecac causes violent vomitting within seconds.  (You should know where I’m going with this.)
3. Fill empty liquor bottle with ipecac, super laxative or similar.  (Ipecac is a dark syrup, so you might want to grab a liquor bottle ‘usually’ containing dark liquor.
4. Flavor / Scent to yummy smelling status.
5. Let thief steal bottle and ‘celebrate.’

Plan 2 -

I’m still kinda working on this one but it involves a pricey looking piece of electronics filled with Fire Ants and Scorpions.

Ideas Welcome…

–D

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